Tiger & Bunny special audio drama: "We Were Young Back Then"

This is a story from before I, Kotetsu Kaburagi, met that bratty newcomer, Barnaby. That night, I was drinking with Rock Bison at the usual bar. We happened to meet Fire Emblem there.

Bartender: Here's your shochu on the rocks.

Kotetsu: Ah, thanks. 

Nathan: Hmm, so this is where you usually drink?

Kotetsu: Sometimes.

Kotetsu: Just to keep Rock Bison company.

Antonio: Huh?! Hey, you make it sound like I'm dragging you here against your will!

Kotetsu: It's too sad to think about a single guy drinking all by himself. "Ah, my precious beloved! Miss Whisky! Heat me up with your love!"

Antonio: You shouldn't talk. Aren't you the one who's always wasting time with blizzards?

Antonio: "I can't fall asleep! I might die!" Ah, you're also a madonna! "My little dakimakura!"

Kotetsu: Rock Bison...

Antonio: You're the one who started it! You bearded narcissist!

Kotetsu: What did you say, bachelor beef?

Nathan: What's with this display of manliness? My chest is too tight!

Antonio: ... Let's settle that score today!

Kotetsu: Bring it!

Nathan: Woah, time, time, time! What do you mean, that score? What happened between you two?

Antonio: I haven't forgotten... It's something from our high school days.

Nathan: Huh? That long ago?

Antonio: You might not believe it looking at me now, but back then I was famous.

Kotetsu: Don't say that yourself.

Antonio: One day, I heard a rumor about another high school student in the neighboring town that had never lost a fight. That was this guy.

Punk 1: Huh? Kotetsu T Kaburagi? What a weird name.

They then go into typical gang talk and speculation, wondering if this guy is going to try to encroach on their territory and such. Antonio says that if he tries, he'll kick his ass.

Kotetsu interrupts.

Kotetsu: Whoa, wait, hold it right there.

Antonio: Hey, don't interrupt people when they talk!

Kotetsu starts giving him flack for the way he's doing the introduction, I think.

Kotetsu: You might not think it now, but back then I was the foremost vanguard or justice.

Antonio: Don't say that yourself. (What's with this foremost vanguard of justice bullshit?)

Then Kotetsu starts by saying he was in the classroom after school one day...

Tomoe: May I have a moment of your time, Mr. Kotetsu T Kaburagi?

Kotetsu: Hm? What is it, Ms. Glasses?

Tomoe: Stop calling me that. I have a name; it's Amamiya.

Kotetsu: Soooo terrible sorrrry, Ms. Class Rep.

Tomoe: Why weren't you at choir practice, Mr. Kotetsu T Kaburagi?*

Kotetsu: Hey, why don't you stop with the full name thing?

Tomoe: Are you listening to what I'm saying?

Kotetsu: Yeah, I'm listening. I wasn't interested.

Tomoe: It's important to promote sociability!

Kotetsu: Yeah, yeah, got it. I'll be there next time!

Tomoe: Oh, honestly...

[*I'm pretty sure she said choir practice, but it could have been something else.]

Tomoe: Hm? What have you been writing all this time? You look so serious.

Kotetsu: Nothing.

She grabs what he was writing.

Kotetsu: Ah, hey! Don’t look at it!

Tomoe: What is this?

Kotetsu: Um, err…I’m trying to think of a hero name.

Tomoe: Why?

Kotetsu: Um, well, it’s sort of my dream and stuff…

Tomoe: Huh?! You’re going to try to become a hero?!

Kotetsu: Go ahead and laugh if you want.

Tomoe: Wow, that’s AMAZING! I’m a big superhero fan!

Kotetsu: Eh?

Kotetsu: Really?!

Tomoe: That’s right! I have the complete premium Hero TV set!

Kotetsu: Whoa, that’s hardcore! Hey, help me choose an awesome name!

Tomoe: All right, but stop yelling about heroes.

Kotetsu: Fine. Anyway, I’ve narrowed it down to these three.

Tomoe: Okay, let’s see. “Fate Wanderer: The Destiny”, “Fearful Body: The Muscle”, and “The Prince of Fists, Mr. Punch”. They all suck. You’re terrible at this.

Kotetsu: Y-You don’t have to say it like that…

Tomoe: Well, why don’t we do this? In “Kotetsu T Kaburagi” there’s the character for “tiger”, so how about “Fighting Tiger”?

Kotetsu: If we’re going to do that, then I’d rather have “Fighting Lion”!

Tomoe: Huh? But I like the “tiger” better…

Kotetsu: But a lion is stronger! All right, how does this sound? “The Indefatigable Wild Lion”! Ah, someone’s coming.

Girl: Kaburagi, Kaburagi, someone from that person is here again.

Kotetsu: Who?

Girl: You know, Antonio, from the next town over.

Kotetsu: Oh, him? Who cares.

Tomoe: Hey, hold on a second. ANOTHER fight?

Kotetsu: No, it’s not like that.

Tomoe: Liar. Otherwise why would this person be angry?

Kotetsu: Hey, it’s not my fault if this guy keeps on bugging–

Tomoe: No violence!

Kotetsu: Geez, you sound like my mom! Why do I have to take this crap from you?

Tomoe: It’s my duty as class rep to make sure that people behave in the proper way!

Kotetsu: You’re overdoing it.

Kotetsu: ...And that's how I learned about Rock Bison.

Nathan: That was an awfully long introduction.

Antonio: Yeah, we didn't need to hear all that stuff with the hero name.

Kotetsu: It's not like yours was any better!

Nathan: Who cares? Get to the main part!

Kotetsu: Hmm, and, uh, then...

Antonio: You're taking too long! I'll tell it.

Antonio then starts his side of the story.

Antonio: Damn Kaburagi! Too chickenshit to face me?

Punk: Antonio, it looks like that asshole has himself a woman!

Antonio: A woman?! How bold!

Punk: Maybe we can use that to lure him out.

Antonio: Huh? How's that?

Punk: I got a great idea.

Later, Kotetsu opens his locker.

Kotetsu: Huh? A letter? Wonder who it's from.

Letter: We've taken your woman. If you want her back, meet us at the Titan Industries factory.

Kotetsu: Those bastards kidnapped my woman!? Wait, who's my woman?

Girl: Kaburagi, Kaburagi, have you seen Amamiya?

Kotetsu: Why? Something up with the classp rep?

Girl: She's usually never late for choir practice...

Kotetsu: Huh?! Did they think my woman was--?! No way!

Kotetsu takes off running.

Antonio: Hey, you guys. You sure Kaburagi is coming?

Punk: He'll be here for sure.

Punk: Ah, it's him! [It sounds like Kotetsu is riding some sort of high tech motorcycle here.]

Antonio: So you finally showed your face, huh, Kaburagi?

Kotetsu: Bringing a group here? That's low.

Antonio: Huh? Don't misunderstand. They're just here to watch. I'm more than enough to kick your ass!

Punk: Huh?

Antonio: Let me tell you, I'm different from these punks. Get to it, guys!

Kotetsu: What are you going to do with those pipes?

Antonio: Just watch.

Antonio activates his NEXT powers.

Kotetsu: You're a NEXT?

Antonio: Okay, do it!

The punks start beating him with the pipes.

Antonio: They can't hurt or scratch me!

Punk: You're amazing, Antonio!

Antonio: How's that, Kaburagi?

Kotetsu: I don't have time to watch your little carnival act. Come on, let's get this started.

Antonio: Y-you asshole! I'll make you eat those words!

The sounds of punching and fighting begins.

Back in the bar...

Antonio: And then my right straight punch slammed into his face. Kotetsu: No, no, no. I'm the one who smashed your fa--

Antonio: Idiot, it was me!

Kotetsu: Nope, it was me!

Nathan: No one cares who it was! So, what happened?

Antonio: It ended in a withdraw.

Kotetsu: Because of the accident.

Antonio: Accident?

Kotetsu: That's why we said it still needed to be settled.

Antonio: Well, if that hadn't happened, we would have never become friends like we are now.

Kotetsu: That's when it started, huh.

Antonio: Yeah, that's right. Ah, bartender, a double whiskey over here.

Bartender: Coming up.

Nathan: Hey, what is this supposed to be?!

Kotetsu and Antonio: Hmmm?

Nathan: No, not "hmm"! At least tell me how you two made up!

Kotetsu: Heh, sorry, we got a little nostalgic there.

Antonio explains that they both stopped at roughly the same time, I think.

Kotetsu: You're not bad, Antonio.

Antonio: Same to you, Kaburagi.

Kotetsu: But it's still cowardly to kidnap a woman with that power!

Antonio: What the hell are you talking about?! I wouldn't do that!

Kotetsu: Oh really? Then what the hell is this?!

He hands over the challenge letter.

Antonio: Hmm? "We've taken your woman. If you want her back..." WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS?! I DIDN'T WRITE THIS!

Kotetsu: Hey, what are you guys doing?!

Punk: It was me, Antonio.

Punk: Yep, we grabbed his woman.


Punk: But his woman--

Antonio: What the hell did you think you were doing?!

He starts attacking them.

Antonio: I don't care if you want to follow me, but someone who targets women and children isn't fit to be called a man!

Punks: W-we're really sorrry!

Kotetsu: I don't care how sorry you are, where's Amamiya?!

Punk: She's in there!

Kotetsu: What a pain!

The factory bursts into flames.

Antonio: Uwaah, w-what happened?!


Back in the bar.

Nathan: The factory exploded?! What happened to the girl?!

Antonio: Well, stuff happened and she ended up fine.

Nathan: That's not a good enough explanation! This is the most important part of the story!

Antonio: Kotetsu used his NEXT powers and saved her.

Kotetsu: Man, the look on your face when I used them...

Antonio: Apologize again!

Punks: We're really, really sorry!

Kotetsu: Forget about it.

Antonio: I just want to know one thing. Why did you hide that you were a NEXT? You could have used those powers against me.

Kotetsu: I decided to only use my powers to save people.

Antonio: W-why?

Kotetsu: Because that's what a hero does!

Antonio: ...h-hero? All right, this one is my loss.

Kotetsu: Huh? What do you mean "this one"?

Antonio: I'm going to continue until we've settled this!

Kotetsu: Come on already! Even if you use your powers, you still won't win against me--

Antonio: I'll only use my powers to protect people! But I'm still not admitting defeat!

Kotetsu: Huhhh?

Antonio: Okay guys, let's go!

Punks: Yessir!

Kotetsu: I don't want to see you ever again!

Tomoe: A-hem.

Kotetsu: Mm? Ahh! Amamiya, are you okay?

Tomoe: Yes, I'm fine. Thank you for saving me.

Kotetsu: No, it wasn't a big deal. Sorry for fighting again.

Tomoe: No. It looks like I was mistaken about you. You're not just some punk.

Kotetsu: Y-you're praising me...?

Tomoe: Hmm. Yep, Tiger definitely suits you better as a hero name.

Kotetsu: What's this all of a sudden?

Tomoe: Tigers don't live in groups. They might call Lions the King of the Jungle, but they have packs. If a tiger and a lion faced one another head on, I think the lion would be the one running away.

Kotetsu: Really?! Then doesn't that make Tigers the strongest?!

Tomoe: That's right! So it suits you perfectly, Kotetsu!

Kotetsu: Um, uh, did...did you just call me...

Tomoe: Ah! Um! I-I-I just thought Kotetsu T Kaburagi w-was too long, so I thought I would give you a little nickname!

Kotetsu: But Kotetsu is my real name...

Tomoe: I-it's not like it matters or anything!

Kotetsu: All right. Whatever you want, Tomoe.

Tomoe: I-I didn't say you could use my f-first name!

Kotetsu: [cough cough] Why'd you hit me? A-and right in the stomach...

Back in the bar.

Kotetsu: And then Rock Bison and I usually met every day after that. Though we managed to get this old without settling things decisively... So, why don't I tell you more about Class Rep Amamiya and my--

Nathan: You really do have a tight butt~

Antonio: S-stupid, why are you doing this in a place like this?

Nathan: Are you saying you'd like to continue this at my place?

Kotetsu: Listen when people are talking!

Nathan: Oh, sorry. So?

Kotetsu: Forget about it.

Nathan: So that's the past between you two? It makes me remember my tale of school love~

Antonio: Hey...

Kotetsu: You mean...

Nathan: It was in the classroom in the summer, a rugby player named Marcero. I might look like this now, but back then I was a first class pretty boy.

Bartender: I'm afraid we're getting ready to close, sir.

Kotetsu: Okay, let's go.

Antonio: Good drinking today!

Nathan: Hey.

Antonio: I don't have my wallet.

Kotetsu: Fine, I'll pay for it.

Antonio: Sorry. My treat next time.

Nathan: Wait.

Kotetsu and Antonio leave, talking about grabbing something to eat.

Nathan: Listen to my story about back then too!!